Just for some background, about a month ago (to the day), I noticed two enlarged lymph nodes just above my left collarbone. I went to Student Health and had blood tests done. Then I was referred to another doctor off-campus. Who then referred me to another doctor (a Nose, Throat, and Neck specialist). Who then referred me for a CT scan. And then told me I had to get more blood tests before I had the procedure I had today.
To make a long story short, I had a biopsy today. An image-guided, core needle biopsy, to be exact. Basically, the kind you're awake for. With a thicker needle.
I had been told it was excruciatingly painful, so I was prepared for the worst. In actuality, it was virtually painless!
Me = VERY RELIEVED/HAPPY
Anyhow, because I'm such a NERD FACE, I'm going to go ahead and explain the procedure. If you start to feel like vomit is about to launch from your insides, you should probably stop reading. But really, it's not that gross, I promise.
Okay, before any actual "surgery" happened, a nurse (who reminded me a LOT of Angela from "The Office") did an ultrasound of my neck. Yep, just like they do for women who are preggers. But thank goodness there was no baby inside my neck.
The ultrasound allowed them to see exactly where the lumps were, as well as where major blood flow was located so they didn't accidentally stick me in the jugular. Or carotid. Or any other number of fancy arteries flowing through the area.
1) The Anesthetic
The first part - and most painful part - is the local anesthetic. Well, actually, the very first thing they do is make you get into a hospital gown (the word "gown" makes it sound so much prettier than it actually is...), and then disinfect the to-be-dissected area with three (count 'em: 1, 2, 3) brown disinfecting swabs. Then the doctor surrounds the area with a sticky paper. I was convinced this paper was put in place so blood wouldn't go flooding everywhere, but the doctor assured me it was just to keep the region "sterile." Sure.
THEN, the doctor told me he was going to stick me with the local anesthetic needle. And that it was going to BURN.
And it did. And I said, "Shit," right in the doctor's face. But I think it was okay because he didn't say anything. I'm sure he gets that reaction all the time.
2) The Incision
Next, he said he was going to make a small incision in my neck.
First off: The word incision is such an awful-sounding word. Merriam-Webster, please think of a new term. Quickly.
Okay, back to talking about the INCISION he was going to make in my NECK. Let's just say I now understand how vampire victims feel. Except, not exactly how they feel because I DIDN'T FEEL A THING! The anesthetic worked like a CHARM! So, even though I was laying there, helpless, with a scalpel at my throat, I felt completely fine! I ♥ you, neck-numbing solution!
3) The Sample Extraction
The doctor said he would have to take three different samples (he ended up taking four because the third extraction wasn't successful, but it was fine because I COULDN'T FEEL ANYTHING!). I told him I didn't want to see the needle before the procedure, but after the procedure, he taught me all about it. And I am now going to forward my newfound medical knowledge to all of you.
Here are two pictures of what was stuck into my neck. The first image is of the core needle instrument (the lower instrument), and the second image is of the needle itself, and how a piece of tissue is extracted (Forget the "Formalin" in the second picture. I have no idea what they're talking about there. I'm not THAT big of a nerd face.):
Ta-dah! So that's what they did to my neck today, and I even got to see the little extracted tissue bits. And it was SO COOL. And my NERD FACE-ness was reaffirmed.
I'm still really surprised it didn't hurt at all, especially from what I had heard. I completely psyched myself out.
Oh, and I'd like to thank Jessica for going with me. She's a fantastic friend, even though she didn't stay in the room for the actual extraction. I don't blame her one bit!
The annoying part of it all is that I have to wait an ENTIRE WEEK for the results, which is a little nerve-wracking, but I'm doing my best to distract myself... Graduation is in 15 days!
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